mod_php is the benchmark. Until you can drop a .js script into ~/public_html/ and have it render HTML and execute the escaped PHP you won't be as simple for a beginner.
Edit: I love coffeescript - prefer it to JS when using node - but I still can't build a web app in a single file on ~/public_html on a shared webhost. Yet.
It's too late to edit my post up there, I meant to say 'render the escaped javascript'. Here's an example PHP script that works as a drop-in assuming mod_php is installed:
All a would-be programmer needs to get rocking in PHP is basic HTML knowledge (check w3schools for instance), an FTP client, and a link to the online PHP manual with its searchable index and extensive sample code. Getting to that point with Node is still a ways off.
Edit: I love coffeescript - prefer it to JS when using node - but I still can't build a web app in a single file on ~/public_html on a shared webhost. Yet.